I enjoy being liked. Fool me twice, strike three.”, “I love inside jokes. 'Hey, your momma's dead.' If you think she's cute now you should have seen her a couple years ago.”, “Sometimes you have to take a break from being the kind of boss that's always trying to teach people things. Okay?”. ”, “It’s a good thing Russia doesn’t exist anymore. Sometimes you just have to be the boss of dancing.”, “Presents are the best way to show someone how much you care. I just want you to treat me like you would some family member who’s undergone some sort of serious physical trauma. Occupations: Entrepreneur, Computer Scientist. And then, suddenly she is not your ho* no mo.”, “When I was five, I imagined that there was such a thing as a unicorn.

Usually in a borderline-heartbreaking manner, Michael repeatedly tries to get in on Jim Halpert’s comedic banter with others. Why? ”, “You may look around and see two groups here: white collar, blue collar. An office is a place to live life to the fullest, to the max, to… An office is a place where dreams come true.”, “I’m making some cosmetic tweaks to help create a more appealing environment. It was love at first see with my ears.”. His father ran the freaking country! But if something else came up I would definitely not go. Because I am collar-blind. Oh I don't know. That got infected. 55 Funny Michael Scott Quotes to Ease Your Day at the Office. Then I go to sleep. “It’s Britney, bitch.” When Michael leaves Dunder … ”, “This is our receptionist, Pam. He moves to Colorado to take care of her aging parents, leaving the manager position to Deangelo Vickers in “Goodbye, Michael,” to Andy Bernard in season 8, after Vickers becomes brain dead, and finally to Dwight Schrute in season 9. — Michael Scott , The Office , Season 3 : The Negotiation. I want people to be afraid of how much they love me.”, “Sometimes I’ll start a sentence and I don’t even know where it’s going. And if Toby is a part of it, then it’ll suck.” “How to take off a woman’s bra: You just twist your hand until something breaks.” “That was offensive and lame. When I wake up, I plug in the grill, I go back to sleep again. Good worker, though. Okay?

It is beCAUSE I hate him.”, “Society teaches us that having feelings and crying is bad and wrong. Is that dishonest? Because your bros are always there for you. Turns out that it’s okay to be a little bit skeptical of the supernatural. We have a day honoring Martin Luther King, but he didn’t even work here.”. All rights reserved. I, Michael Scott, am signing up with an online dating service. Couldn’t even talk yet.”, “Well, it’s love at first sight. Sometimes I spend too much time volunteering. “I’m not superstitious, but I am a little ‘stitious.”. Just not too much. Easy. Once Stanley had his heart attack, Michael realized he had no clue what to do in emergency medical situations, so it was time to bring in an expert to train the office. They were flying all over the place and they were scary and they’d come down and they’d suck the soul out of your body and it hurt!”, When one of the Scranton branch members compares working there to being in prison, Michael decides to teach the team a lesson about what prison is really with a little help from his friend “Prison Mike.”, “When the son of the deposed king of Nigeria emails you directly, asking for help, you help!

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